Did you know that 40 to 50 % of marriages end in divorce nowadays. YIKES! Have you been wondering what is causing you to go from a fun-loving relationship to an unhappy and miserable one? Well today I wanted to talk about 10 things that may be destroying your relationship without you even noticing.
10 THINGS TO STOP DOING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Nagging – This one is so common, many people overlook it. When you have someone constantly harassing you to do something, it becomes annoying. Like leave me the f alone annoying. Imagine you had someone on top of you at all times asking you to do things. Instead, find ways to get things done on your own sometimes. Remember your partner is not a personal assistant, maid or driver.
Playing games – It’s almost 2018 and I sure don’t know how the younger crowd is handling dating, but one thing is for sure– no one likes a person who simply wants to play games. By this I mean, being with someone who constantly has lame excuses for not answering their phones, cancels on your dinner plans, is not trustworthy and you feel unsure where you stand in the relationship. No need to be in a relationship if you are going to be wasting someone’s time.
Checking your partners phone/emails– This is up there on the list as well. First of all, if you are basing a new relationship on how an ex used to be, you are setting yourself up for failure. Not everyone is the same and there is no need to go thru your boyfriend/girlfriend’s personal things. If they have lied to you before, it’s understandable that you would want to know if they are doing it again, but keep in mind no relationship has ever lasted when one has to constantly check what the other person has on their phones or emails. If there is major trust issues, you might as well LET IT GO.
Telling little lies – This can quickly evolve to become a total relationship destruction and adding on going arguments. Being in a relationship with someone means you respect them enough to speak the truth at all times. If you don’t care about that person, then you might as well stay single. No matter how small of a lie it can be, it can create trust issues between the two bringing the relationship down.
Arguing about small stuff – We all know there are going to be arguments and disagreements in all relationships. But we need to stop arguing about the smallest, silliest things that quite frankly, will not even matter a few days later. Don’t waste your time making a big scene or issue over something that can just be discussed and handled in a 5 minute conversation.
Being selfish – When you are single and free, you care about just you. But when you enter a relationship it means it’s no longer just about you. You have to put your partner first a lot of times because good relationships are based on compromise. It will never be 100% about you anymore. Let that sink in. (I know it’s hard, I’m a selfish individual too)
Avoiding difficult conversations– If you can’t sit and talk about anything bothering you or both this means you cannot handle the responsibilities of a relationship. When able to handle difficult conversations with your partner, it strengthen the relationship. And I don’t mean yelling or arguing about a problem. I mean discuss how each other feels and what can be done to move past it.
Focusing on ONLY the negative When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, you learn your partners ways, his good habits and not so good ones. How you choose to handle them can make or break the relationship. Focusing on only the negatives would be unfair and not only that, it will not leave room for the good things. All the negative tension will only make it worse and eventually break up that bond that ties you two together. Don’t forget we are all humans and make mistakes.
Saying NO to sex – This may not seem like a big deal, not everyone wants sex every night. But it’s important to know that a healthy relationship needs that physical connection. if your partner is constantly given the “no, not tonight I’m too tired” card or “my head hurts” eventually you may feel unwanted and may just find what you are not getting at home somewhere else. And no one wants that! So like everything else you do, make time for sex.
Falling into a boring routine – This is super common as well. As adults, we have many responsibilities that need to get done on a daily basis. Especially if you are parents. We often see day-to-day tasks as a checklist. Take the kids to school, go to work, come home and make dinner, put the kids to bed…. this can quickly become a killer. Your partner or even you can easily find anything out of their regular routine interesting and this is when many partners find themselves cheating. It’s important to change things up sometimes, and remind that person why you fell in love with them.
While there are many more factors that can destroy relationships, these are just a few I hope are helpful.
In conclusion, I hope you can analyze your relationship and decide which of these listed need to stop immediately if you want a good and healthy relationship.
Till next time,